Know your CHICA

I quite often hear Men/boys saying " I don't know what she wants"  Referring to their wife/Gf , but i never hear them saying " I tried finding what she wants but I am still not able to figure it out" which makes me wonder did they even try??? I understand and know females  are little complex compared to their counterpart Males but its not rocket science.

Men are simple , they don't care much about things , don't easily feel bad  as their expectations are always low, don't get affected with happenings around them and comparatively have better reactions !!
Females on the other hand care about every small thing , feel bad easily as they always expect more than they should , get affected even if a friend buys a Da Milano bag and she doesn't own one yet and fret over  lot of things.

No doubt there is a contrasting difference between these two species but that's what needs to be understood and  accepted.
Maybe you need to put in little extra effort in trying to decipher what is she saying , not just once but twice or maybe more than that til the time you actually start understanding and making sense of the few said , few unsaid words.
She puts in that effort, when you watch the test cricket match over the weekend and she orders in your favorite snack , when you don't know what to wear and she helps you finding the right tie for the meeting and it goes on.
So why cant you??
These are few basic characteristics every female has , you master these and you ll never have a complaining lady!

1. They are Sensitive : You cant blame them for this , its a gift!  But few men understand this. There are 2 kinds here:
a. The first one who is very strong and doesn't show it to the public/people around her , they wont accept it in the first go but ask them twice and they ll melt down. But don't be mistaken with their strong persona.
b. The 2nd type is Little extra feminine/ sensitive and doesn't mind hiding her emotions in public etc, you need to be nice to them at that weak moment and don't make them feel "what the hell are you doing"
Don't ever step on your lady's emotion . That's the thumb rule!

2.Talkative: Yes, they like talking their heart out. About anything ranging from what they shopped, or how excited they are about their friends wedding or when they are simply complaining . Just listen to them , don't hear and ignore, LISTEN, I am assuming you very well know the difference.
It comforts them, when you listen to they feel accepted , cared , loved.

3. Conscious: Women are very conscious, they want to look good.  They are concerned about their weight unlike men who actually like to flaunt their Bellies. So respect them for being conscious and help them make and attain a realistic target if they are in the process of weight loss.
When they ask you " how am i looking" which might happen like everyday, don't go overboard because they ll catch you. If you feel she is not looking good you can try using this " This is just ok , you look better in XYZ" . Don't forget to compliment them, they Love it but please don't go overboard and don't use cheesy lines !! Strictly NOO

4. Let them SHOP: If they love anything in this world after YOU , its shopping , let them do that. Its like a therapy for them. The way you feel  when you go out with you friends for a drink , they feel when they get your credit Card/ or their own salary and freedom to Shop.
If in-case she is a shopaholic you can say this " why don't you try saving for few months and buy some good Jewellery for yourself " She might RE think!

5.Pamper them: Owing to their very basic nature they love getting pampered/cared by their man. They even flaunt this, so in the end you are only getting good points from friends and family.
It need not be extravagant , get her flowers some time , plan a dinner and just ask her to dress her best ,
when she is sick get her a bowl of soup and a Cd of her favorite movie, take her out for a drive and play her favorite music.

Is this all rocket science?????

In Addition you can try not forgetting her birthday,your anniversary !!

All the time we feel we don't understand the person , its just because we miss on these few small things which form foundation of their very basic nature.
Work on these characteristics and your lady wont ever bother you ( I am not giving you any assurity but trust me things will become smoother and the relationship more stronger)

Though it requires Patience , little extra effort and lots of understanding its better than a Crying, shouting Lady!

And I don't think its too much of a effort  for the  woman you love the most.

To the 7 years of Togetherness

A conference call with my 2 very close girlfriends  after a gap of more than 2 months made me realize  how everything has changed in the past  4 years , I realized it a very long time ago but today I accepted it . There is a fine line between realization and acceptance , I was still living in the first stage.
But today was the Day to accept it.
The friendship dates back to 2006 , 7 + years now , then I didn't even imagine that someday the life would be what it is today, that we all will be in different cities with different circumstances and priorities , that  we wont meet everyday or lets get Little realistic once in few months, that we wont be able to talk everyday , that whatsapp will be the first mode of contact .
None of this was thought about , the set of expectations from our future were very different . We have thought of working in the same city , living the kind of life together that we couldn't while we were  in hostel  and this is not unrealistic neither hyped  nor does it look like we were trying to live a REEL life?? But still it didn't happen, why??  Maybe because  we didn't try hard enough to make it work or the circumstances didn't support us , Or did we know already that  this is not going to happen and we chose our own ways assuming that's how its meant to be

7 years ago our lives would be somewhat like this-
 Go to college, meet up in cafeteria ( yes, we hostelers were too close and wouldn't leave a chance to catch-up in the canteen even if we  shared the same room or corridor!) or in the mess for lunch ,go for our respective CA ,CAT coaching ,  evenings would be spent at  the nearest Chaat Corner checking out  Hot - brainless Delhi boys and their Super Hot cars , chat endlessly with a bowl of Maggie in the night and crib about the awful bf's we had or how broke we were , in addition we ll have  late night parties, movies, the much awaited Official  sociales with famous  Boys hostels  all across Delhi and  regular room-parties where the agenda was Gossip( wonder what  we talked about for nights together!)

The CHANGE:
After 3 years of graduation it changed to meeting up once in a month at least ,having a conference call whenever we couldn't decide on a party dress or what to gift our respective bf's along-with regular calls every 2 days to heal our otherwise tired souls, I knew it was changing but  life was moving at a fast pace and all of us were running fast to keep up with it.

At the end of 5th year  there was plethora of change , I moved to Banaglore, Mrigakshi moved to Hisar , Pankhuri kept on shuttling between Delhi and her hometown. There was too much disturbance, all of us trying hard to keep up with the situations we were put in, trying to make the best , moving too fast in a direction we didn't plan for us, but that's what we were told by the more experienced people which we didn't want to believe otherwise.
We  thought this is it, we are settled now , this is how it will be  from now on-wards , little aware that the major change was yet to come. How ignorant we can be.

Mirgakshi was the first one to get married, it changed the equation totally , took a lot of time for us( ME)
 to adjust , changes are not only  inevitable but Hard too.
We again tried to manage with the situation and tried keeping the bond intact , the no. of calls decreased as whatsapp came into picture ,the no. of meetings decreased as  the distance increased from few kms to few hundered kms ( I haven't yet met her, its been more than a year now)
Not that we didn't  try but the situations just didn't  let us and one person cant manage , it has to be mutual , think we missed that part.

Now our conference call goes like this-
The married one talks about how marriage  has changed her life for good or bad, what new she cooked and how she has started to feel her baby kick ( we gonna welcome our first nephew/niece)
The other one is going to get married in 2 months time and we plan her trousseau and what place she is going for the honeymoon and how happy she is ( God bless her)
And I am the last one to give updates with rather no Updates.
The difference is Palpable.

More Then a Year Ago

Now its time for a change again  and this one going to be a big one as  one of us will become a mother, the other a wife and 3rd pretty much the same.
Again there will be an effort to make the equation work and lots of adjustments in expectations , maybe our friendship will survive all this , yet again, or maybe not ( I will rather be optimistic).
I cant say if the bond got stronger or not , but what matter is its still there and I hope it stays .
That change is Inevitable and the sooner we accept the happier we would be , situations change , people change , your importance in their lives change but the time we  shared  is a treasure ,we cant live it again and that's the beauty of it and that's why we value  it so much.

In the end what matters is ,we still share our lives.

“We'll be Friends Forever, won't we, Pooh?' asked Piglet.
Even longer,' Pooh answered.” 

+mrigakshi singal  - You are still the self Proclaimed Princess.
+pankhuri grover  - You are still the Babe.

Motorcycle Diaries

Bikes never fascinated me, the reason being all those 16 something guys riding the mean machine under the influence of adrenaline rush and blowing away the most irritating hooters you have ever heard of. So clearly as I never had a reason or compulsion of being a pillion I stayed away from them.

But Bangalore changed it all , most of the new  friends here owned a bike and after avoiding the rides for  few days I  had no option but to finally give up to this Machine. And as my friend dodged the bike in Banaglore's  infamous traffic my heart skipped a beat with every dodge, I prayed and hoped for a traffic signal that too a red one so that I can catch my breath!!!
 All of them being experienced riders ,over their 16 something phase  made sure not to cross speed of  50, gradually with the no. of rides , good rider friends and necessity  we both became friends ( the bike and me). 

We started liking each others company as she stopped scaring me and I stopped hating her.  I wouldn't scream when it was accelerated to 80 or 100 on the highway , my heart got used to all the dodging and I stopped praying for red traffic signals .

The next big  step in our friendship was a road  trip, 5 of us decided to go to Hoggenakal and back the same day , the day was beautiful with no sun and a well laid highway with minimal traffic, as we sped at 100km/hr  my heart craved for more, I could see the tress passing by, trucks being overtaken and feel the wind in my hair, with my favorite songs on the Ipod and a butter smooth ride I fell in love with her( IT).

The no. of bike trips increased followed by one to Nandi hills , many casual trips on  NICE road and  trip to Mysore, yes we rode to Mysore and  what a trip it was , our backs ached but  our spirits relished the journey.

And finally it was time to take this friendship to the very next level .
After taking the riders seat few times I backed out every single time. But one fine day or one fine late night when the traffic was minimal I took the plunge and finally started , my friend instructed in this sequence - press the clutch, change the gear to 1 ,release the clutch slowly and accelerate , it was too much information to process while trying to balance that 100 kg something Darling( the Bike) ,as soon I would accelerate it would turn off , finally after few trials it did listen to me and started off  and here I was on Bangalore's street driving a Motorcycle  for the very first time. For the first time I could feel why people love this Machine, why they worship their bikes.
I was Happy, very happy.
While I was relishing my first ride and making sure there was no heavy vehicle in vicinity of 200 mts I was asked to shift to  gear 2 which wasn't tough and I was elated ( So soon I was moving to 2nd gear)  but  but when I was asked to shift  from 2  to 1 it jolted and stopped ,here I was, on the main Road disappointed  by the fact that I couldn't shift the gear ( More disappointed then when I got to know my 10th result).
I switched on the engine again with the same enthusiasm I started for the first time, failed again and again  but how long Can she not love me back and I completed my very first ride of 10 kms.
After quite a few trips from kormangala to old madras road, few in Indiranagar , kaggdaspura, 1 on inner ring road , 2 on NICE road I stopped embarrassing everyone.
I was declared a Good rider.( It was not easy as it looks like)

In the end it was not  about conquering the machine but the experience, the thrill, the art , the ultimate freedom I felt.

A heartfelt thanks to 2 friends of mine who tolerated me with all their hearts +Mayank Tiwari  , +jagadish sahu who helped me Do the unthinkable.

40 Something CYCling TRIP

Last week I took part in a cycling trip organised by Go Cycling GO Green  Vol 3 to mark the environment day , it got that VOL3 along with the title because it was  3rd such event organised by Buzzintown in association with BTC this time. So as the event splashed on my Facebook and lurked me to register myself   I was in double mind because of multiple reasons like the distance that said 40 kms ( I haven't cycled  for last 10 years ) , the fact that after this  my legs and parts of my body wont be of any use for few days altogether, plus there was Ananda Run the same day  and yes the last one  what if I embarrass myself by being the slowest rider in the group!!
So I would visit the registration page every alternate day ,check the last day for registration and give myself more reasons to say NO. Finally one fine day, that was 27th may I registered ( no I wasn't drunk , I did it in my senses).

Saturday arrived in no time and I reached the venue much before time out of excitement . Met my friends who have  also registered, I've  sent them  the invite hoping I ll get few  more legs to get embarrassed along with me , that's how we all get satisfaction , don't we???
There was a good mix of people, the youngest rider being 12-13 years old , lots of youngsters ,  2 beautiful ladies and quite a few experienced Male Riders.

So we filled the form, got our T-shirt with GOCycling GoGreen logo
( I loved the shirt as I can flaunt it..heee) ,hogged on the delicious breakfast ,the spread had  healthy stuff  but who cares when Aloo puri is in competition , Aloo puri it was and for me the event was successful already :) ,chose our cycles and were all ready for the flag off to be done by  Bangalore's fitness Queen Wanitha Ashoka. And as we all started the journey with lots of enthusiasm , smiles, I pods  we hardly knew the journey would become a memorable one.


On the way we got lot of smiles, thumbs up, cheering and almost everyone seem to stop to make way for us, starting from the Autowalas, to the mighty young riders ,the lorry drivers and our very friendly the bus drivers , it was indeed overwhelming  to see such support from our fellow Bangloreans. The volunteers kept on cheering us all the way through, had introductory session with few fellow riders while riding and bumped into few while trying to make use of the breaks!.

Our first break was more of a meet up then a break, people started interacting and clicking pictures( yeah, this didn't happen all this while..phewww), shared the frame  with quite a few people while sipping on a mango juice, replenished our energy .As we hit the Kanakpura road  the traffic increased ,the condition of road got worse
( though its consistently bad across Bangalore ) , our speed decreased and in no time it was
Another BREAK time.
This time it was Coconut water , energy bars and  biscuits, I literally felt we have come for a picnic rather  then a cycling trip, the photography sessions started again along with the "Getting to know People" sessions (We cant get to know 60 people in just 1 break, at least 10 are required averaging you give 4 minutes to each person* 60=240 ) and finally after little request from me, the youngest cyclist  and  Darius ( The famous RJ) we finally started again.

The ride was enjoyable as the weather was beautiful , no sun  , no rain , only cool breeze to support our enthusiasm .Few kms before the resort handful of us decided to ride for few more kms and take the fellow riders to Art of Living Ashram ( we AOL volunteers don't leave a chance to visit the ashram, and as Guruji was there we had even more stronger reason.)

At the Art of Living Ashram

Visited the ashram , met Guruji (I couldn't), finished the much needed ritual of clicking pictures and rode back to the Resort , people were relaxing , splashing water in the pool , few revisiting school days and enjoying the rides meant for kids and after a quick analysis as to what I want to do I  saw bunch of guys playing volleyball and there was no need of options anymore.( I lobbb volleyball, most of you know this already)




And as my legs pleaded and asked for some  rest my  passion for volley asked them to shut up and in no time the lunch was ready , obviously the brain did listen to the need of  empty stomach and aching legs .

I filled my plate with all that sumptuous  food and shared few conversations with the fellow riders , lots of interesting people, lots of stories and most importantly I got bunch of new friends :)
By the time all of us got over with the lunch it was time for all the planned activities 1) An activity with the drums, people had good fun beating the drums and singing along in their awful voices 2) Stand up comedy by Praveen Kumar and sharing of  interesting facts by Environmentalist and Scientist Harish Bhatt.


It was past 4 already and me and my friends decided to leave , I didn't have the energy to cycle back another 20 kms but all thanks to the RED BULL I was energetic again( It did wonders)

The journey back was pretty tough as I was tired , it was uphill for few kms ,was in a hurry to reach back and hit my bed , to add to this it started to pour , the traffic got worse and the otherwise lovely  bangloreans became irritating as they walked on the wrong side of the road . Because of the traffic and different cycling pace we were little ahead of 2 other friends and I was riding along with Shiva who had a tough time handling my tantrums ( I was heartily sorry later).

"THE RED BULL Pose"

The situation got bad as it started raining heavily, got dark, had mud splashed all over my clothes ( the stupid cycle didn't have a mud guard and stupid me didn't notice this while choosing this bike) and I started cursing the day I registered for this  event
( It was all temporary)

As my dear friend Shiva kept his temper under control and tried figuring out the way I craved more for my bed and some Iodex !! Finally after 3 hours of struggle and cycling we reached the hotel and what a feeling it was, cannot be expressed and cannot be written . I changed into new pair of clothes ( I would have died of hypothermia otherwise , who would have shared this with you then, eh??) , opened the last packet of biscuit and prayed hard for the rain to stop. And as the Rain god listened to our otherwise aching legs and empty stomachs it was time to go back home, eat at least 4 plates full of food , increase revenue of Iodex ,slip into the warmth of my blanket  and have the best sleep I have had in a very long time.

The question was " Will I do this again"???
Hell ya.

The dates are already booked  for September.
Hope to see you this time

Here is the link for the Photographs clicked by official photographer of the event "Anthony George"
http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.473553282720198.1073741838.406864292722431&type=3

Delhi vs Bangalore

After Living in Delhi for 5 years , technically NCR 2 and Delhi 3 leaving Delhi was a tough tough tough decision ( Though a forced one, as I got a job here) but I was looking forward to Bangalore or rather to my first job. Left Delhi with truck loads of tears and Carful of people who came to drop me off ( the first and the last time when there were actually 6 people to see me off) . I  Landed in Bangalore with a quite a few suitcases and a dream to go back to Delhi within 6 months.

Well I completed 2 years in April 13 and all these 2 years I have been  part of much debated Topic that of Delhi-NCR vs Bangalore . I still cant say which city I love  more ,but quite often I hear 2 fictitious voices each supporting Delhi and Bangalore, lets name those 2 fictitious voices as  Dili and Luru .

Here are  few excerpts from the conversation:

Owing to its basic nature Luru  always gives Dili the first chance to speak up , given Dili's spunky nature it hits off .

Dili :  I got the better  infrastructure esp  broader/better  roads, good metro connectivity , better traffic sense and the  hometown is just 3 hours away .

Luru : Agree that you got better and broader  roads but that happened only because of commonwealth games , don't forget your good old days. Metro is coming up and the bus connectivity is unbeatable. Your buses are famous for all the wrong reasons.

(Dili is ashamed but quick with the reply)

Dili: The cost of living here is less , mouth watering north Indian food and you got relatives to count on.
 Do you have off  for  Holi and Diwali ???

(Luru is listening patiently and  ready with the points)

Luru:  You don't need relatives here , nobody does any harm to you ,people wont bother you at all and thus YOU can be  the queen of your life . Plus its safer ,all my women friends don't feel unsafe even if they are travelling alone at 1 am in the night . While none of them ever traveled alone after 7 pm  your city.
We have more educated and working women here who are not shy of pursuing their dreams and feel proud   of working in a petrol pump or as a bus conductor.

Dili: You need relatives to have a family time.All your college friends are here, you have no one  there and don't forget all the events you missed.

Luru: As the majority of crowd is working its easier to make friends here , people are simple and  know their limit, there is no show off , there is no pressure of looking good all the time, you can be yourself and not a Fake.
There are hundreds of weekend gateways and numerous activities you can engage in , partying is not the focus here, rather a lot more interesting activities .

Dili : People here are more friendly and warm, they are open hearted and always welcoming even if you are a stranger , they live life to the fullest and don't just focus on jobs and earning more, they give importance to family as well.
Don't forget river rafting in Rishikesh , midnight trips to Murthal , all girls trip to Shimla.

Luru: This is a major IT hub and that's why the salaries are good.  Did  u forget the Bike trip, the camping trip, Pondichery with your girlfriend and the leverage of travelling alone.
I forgot to mention the weather, you have any point on that???

Its been 2 years here, I read somewhere the plan was 6 months!!

Delhi got the answer and I didn't hear anything from her after this.

Para hacer la lista ( TO DO LIST)

Do you Realize its JUNE already ( Half the year is over). DON'T  PANIC( take deep breaths..yes, you are doing good ).
On the brighter side we still have 7 more beautiful months ( And its going to be a season full of holidays and weddings, isn't it??)

Like most of us I made  a Checklist of things I wanted to do  in  year 2013 which goes to the good looking  dustbin every year  within 24 hours of getting drafted. So what if  the dustbin enjoyed company of my beautifully handwritten checklist I still managed to do few things from the list.

How many did u do???? Oh wait, do you even have a checklist???  Not that its compulsory , its a feel good  thing ( at least  for me) , you are not a Robot or a Zombie  if you didn't make one , its just a matter of choice. Please don't stop reading this post :( You might feel like making one by the end of this post or otherwise you can always comment what is "wrong with her" ):

Well my checklist was longgggggggggggg ( its the thumb rule plus few "to do things" got carried forward from all the years of making a checklist and gifting it to the dustbin ) so that I can choose freely . It got 10 things that I wanted to do in 12 months ,considering the fact I have a full time job and I have to go n visit my parents twice every year the list was unrealistic ( But do you see the level of optimism?? do u???).  I ll share few things I have done already and which were indeed  part of that checklist.

1. Visit Goa/ Ladkah/ Andaman ( I visited Goa in February )

2. Start Volunteering Actively ( I even interviewed for one NGO  for a year long commitment but guess they didn't like me)

3. Start Socializing ( This one is little absurd , but I have literally locked myself in  the 10 boundaries of my flat and limited myself to my flatmates in the year  of 2012 ( please don't question me on the reasons),     it was a HIGH priority!!

4. Run a Marathon ( Its been there on the list for more than a decade )

5. Start writing a BLOG ( that never was on the list!!!!)

So yes I did some proud to the otherwise crumpled checklist of mine in past  5 months and Plan to do it yet again in the coming 7 months. Don't sweat if you couldn't do anything from your  checklist , there can be many reasons like:

1. You were not in the right mindset/ went through a Breakup/ Lost your pet
2. You didn't have time as you spend 18 hours in Office ( By choice or compulsion)
3. You just got married and too busy enjoying the bliss-full few months
4. Your are just Lazy

First 3 reasons accepted  but 4th that's more like an Excuse. You must be at least  23+ ( assuming all the readers are my friends and I don't seem to know anyone younger ( except for few niece and nephews).
Time is just running away , there will never be a  "right time", right moment to do what you always wanted to .If you are studying , you will start working and then marriage and then kids and then you can think on your own.
If there is ever a  " RIGHT TIME " it is " RIGHT NOW ".Don't wait for the right person or the the Right moment ,they are fictitious and part of the games that our mind plays. Even if you don't want to have a checklist just decide on 2 things you want to do by the end of 2013 and do it for  REAL.

You will feel really really good ( thousand times better  compared to what you feel when you receive the message " salary has been credited in you account " or "when you score 99 percentile in CAT" ), there is nothing more comforting then the fact  that you accomplished something you heart has been craving for.

Till then .......Clock is ticking!!!!! Just 7 Months!!!!!

P.S - Don't forget to share few items from your checklist in the comments below:)