We had just finished a 800 rupee Ice-cream as our dinner & were fiddling with our respective laptops, we sat in a plush colony of Bengaluru overlooking the passers go by; the reason I mention the ice cream's cost is not to be pompous but to draw a comparison as I narrate the events of rest of the evening.
It was an usual Sunday evening ,nothing has been different about the day yet.
A 10-12 year old boy peeped through the railings , I could see his lips move , an obvious sign that he was saying something. I took the earphones out to hear him say " do you speak Hindi"? Now its very unlikely in Karnataka to hear this question and it was probably the first time I did ( I have only ASKED this question & never the other way round)
I said " I do" , behind him was a sari clad lady with a baby girl in hand who was fast asleep, i continued to make some observations measuring how much jewellery she wore and if she had footwear on or not . He continued to narrate " We are from Maharashtra and have come here for work , but we lost our father in the city & now we don't have any money , can you please help us get some food and ticket to Ankola.
We humans don't trust each other easily , forget about strangers walking by asking for money. I continued to ask him question if he had an ID card , whats in his bag and their names. they obviously did not have any id card , the bag was almost empty except for few pair of clothes.
My first instinct was to help them, at least get them food but there was nothing near by hence I continued to discuss the matter with Ravi, during that time another lady and a boy ( 18-25 years old) emerged , they continued to tell me a similar story .
They could read my expressions whether I was willing to help or not , the lady signaled to leave but the youth hushed her because he could sense my eagerness to do something.
This pushed me back a little to re-think what I was doing , I believe when in doubt at least provide a meal to one in need , they cannot misuse it. I told them to wait there & I will be back in 20 minutes with some food , I got into the car ,they continued to thank me and assured me that they will wait there.
600 metres away there was a food joint & as I got out of the car a boy came running with a similar story , I was still trying to gather all my thoughts when a 30 year old something passer warned me saying this is all scam , don't listen to him. By now all my guards were up and I was unsure if I even want to get the food but as I made a promise to that family I decided to go ahead and get the food packed .
It took 20 minutes or something for the food to get ready , I got out of the place and the entire family was there , 2 ladies , 2 kids, 1 old man with his wife & one 20 something youth. They followed us?
The old lady wasn't there before , I asked them if they lied to me about their father getting lost as I could see the old man , to which they confirmed the person lost is the father whereas this person was the grandfather. I didn't want to ask anything else, I handed over the food , they continued to ask for some money to reach majestic so I handed over some with a pointer to where to get the bus from.
ALL IT COSTED ME WAS THAT 1 ICE-CREAM WE ATE AN HOUR AGO.
I left.
This is not the first time this has happened, multiple times before I have met people asking for food or telling a story about being lost , even with a doubt I chose to help them at least with food part. Every time there is a conflict to HELP or NOT HELP, we choose not to because its easier not to trust , not to put that little extra effort. On the contrary when you want to help its not easy to take a decision when mind & conscience are at conflict.
But I rather choose to HELP.
I am not promoting organised beggary, every single day a kid walks up to the car showing his mark-sheet & asking for tuition fee, at those times I wish I could get out of the car go to his place validate his statements and help him, but I am guilty of never doing that.
The other times an old lady shivering to death would plead for money and as soon its a green signal she would be all normal. To these people I don't want to give money, I question myself how 10 rupees would have mattered to me for which she could have gotten a cup of tea.
Then there are people who sell fruits , pens or toys , I buy from them , why not? I know they are selling a 3 rupee pen for 10 but they are not begging , they are toiling by going to each & every window in that heat & pollution. Now again even if they are part of some organised group , so what??
People like me spend on movies, clothes , trips , luxury goods without thinking once but when it comes to helping a person by buying a 10 rupee pen apparently I should be aware that he might be a a part of an organised scam?
I shouldn't buy a 300 rupee meal for a family of 6 as they are probable cheats but can relish a 300 rupee ice-cream ?
How does 1 justify this? I cant.
There is so much bad in this world, why cant for once we not think about other person's intention & just spread good vibes ? I am not giving away my wealth or my life, its just about a meal or few odd rupees which I would spend anyways somewhere worthless.
I read some where :
Choose being KIND over being RIGHT , and you will be right every time.
P. S - We took another round of the area where we saw the family last , they were busy eating :)
It was an usual Sunday evening ,nothing has been different about the day yet.
A 10-12 year old boy peeped through the railings , I could see his lips move , an obvious sign that he was saying something. I took the earphones out to hear him say " do you speak Hindi"? Now its very unlikely in Karnataka to hear this question and it was probably the first time I did ( I have only ASKED this question & never the other way round)
I said " I do" , behind him was a sari clad lady with a baby girl in hand who was fast asleep, i continued to make some observations measuring how much jewellery she wore and if she had footwear on or not . He continued to narrate " We are from Maharashtra and have come here for work , but we lost our father in the city & now we don't have any money , can you please help us get some food and ticket to Ankola.
We humans don't trust each other easily , forget about strangers walking by asking for money. I continued to ask him question if he had an ID card , whats in his bag and their names. they obviously did not have any id card , the bag was almost empty except for few pair of clothes.
My first instinct was to help them, at least get them food but there was nothing near by hence I continued to discuss the matter with Ravi, during that time another lady and a boy ( 18-25 years old) emerged , they continued to tell me a similar story .
They could read my expressions whether I was willing to help or not , the lady signaled to leave but the youth hushed her because he could sense my eagerness to do something.
This pushed me back a little to re-think what I was doing , I believe when in doubt at least provide a meal to one in need , they cannot misuse it. I told them to wait there & I will be back in 20 minutes with some food , I got into the car ,they continued to thank me and assured me that they will wait there.
600 metres away there was a food joint & as I got out of the car a boy came running with a similar story , I was still trying to gather all my thoughts when a 30 year old something passer warned me saying this is all scam , don't listen to him. By now all my guards were up and I was unsure if I even want to get the food but as I made a promise to that family I decided to go ahead and get the food packed .
It took 20 minutes or something for the food to get ready , I got out of the place and the entire family was there , 2 ladies , 2 kids, 1 old man with his wife & one 20 something youth. They followed us?
The old lady wasn't there before , I asked them if they lied to me about their father getting lost as I could see the old man , to which they confirmed the person lost is the father whereas this person was the grandfather. I didn't want to ask anything else, I handed over the food , they continued to ask for some money to reach majestic so I handed over some with a pointer to where to get the bus from.
ALL IT COSTED ME WAS THAT 1 ICE-CREAM WE ATE AN HOUR AGO.
I left.
This is not the first time this has happened, multiple times before I have met people asking for food or telling a story about being lost , even with a doubt I chose to help them at least with food part. Every time there is a conflict to HELP or NOT HELP, we choose not to because its easier not to trust , not to put that little extra effort. On the contrary when you want to help its not easy to take a decision when mind & conscience are at conflict.
But I rather choose to HELP.
I am not promoting organised beggary, every single day a kid walks up to the car showing his mark-sheet & asking for tuition fee, at those times I wish I could get out of the car go to his place validate his statements and help him, but I am guilty of never doing that.
The other times an old lady shivering to death would plead for money and as soon its a green signal she would be all normal. To these people I don't want to give money, I question myself how 10 rupees would have mattered to me for which she could have gotten a cup of tea.
Then there are people who sell fruits , pens or toys , I buy from them , why not? I know they are selling a 3 rupee pen for 10 but they are not begging , they are toiling by going to each & every window in that heat & pollution. Now again even if they are part of some organised group , so what??
People like me spend on movies, clothes , trips , luxury goods without thinking once but when it comes to helping a person by buying a 10 rupee pen apparently I should be aware that he might be a a part of an organised scam?
I shouldn't buy a 300 rupee meal for a family of 6 as they are probable cheats but can relish a 300 rupee ice-cream ?
How does 1 justify this? I cant.
There is so much bad in this world, why cant for once we not think about other person's intention & just spread good vibes ? I am not giving away my wealth or my life, its just about a meal or few odd rupees which I would spend anyways somewhere worthless.
I read some where :
Choose being KIND over being RIGHT , and you will be right every time.
P. S - We took another round of the area where we saw the family last , they were busy eating :)
