Bangalore - Where dreams are for REAL

Two and a half years back I arrived in this city with a lucrative offer letter, lots of suitcases and a hope to leave this city within Few months. The offer letter doesnt look lucrative anymore, suitcases have been unpacked and the stuff well settled in the big cupboards and the HOPE has been destroyed by the Love this city showered on me.
No , the start wasn't good, the first 6 months were tormenting , full of tears, Ill health and a strong Will to go back , I wonder what changed.

Few say its easy to love this city, few say you get accustomed to the city and dont want to move out of the comfort zone while others say I am mistaking comfort with Love.

The first few months I cursed the food they served here, it hampered my health and made me miss my oil filled north Indian food, I would hate the traffic, the potholes,the frequently changing weather ,Unfriendly people , The Auto rickshaw drivers ,People  who talked in Kannada and made me look like an Alien, The high cost of living , The 11 pm deadline and the fact that I was in SOUTH INDIA.
I would curse and crib Non- Stop . I know people who leave without trying , who still don't like it here and others who don't want to go back

What Changed for me??

I Tried .

I started trying all kind of south Indian food , became friends with lots of south Indians who are definitely not unfriendly,  tried learning Kannada so as to make some sense , Learnt the tricks of trade with Auto rickshaw drivers, fell in love with the weather , the beautiful Rains and finally accepted this CITY.
It gave me much and didn't ask anything in return. Delhi takes away your innocence,  Mumbai takes away your TIME. Bangalore just GIVES.

The reason you fall in love with this city is it gives you a lot  and hardly takes away anything.
 It gives you the freedom to relish your dreams, the freedom to wear anything and not feel out of place, the freedom to explore every opportunity you ever wanted to , freedom to live the interests you only thought off, the taste of independence and finally the freedom to be YOURSELF.
It gave me a well paid job , A Guru , helped me fulfill my little dreams ,A chance to challenge my limits ( refer to Running ) , Courage to Live life on my conditions. and gave back the lost innocence.

I have achieved a lot more than I thought , career wise everyone does some day , what matters is if you fulfill those little little dreams , if you live an effortless life , do things that comfort you.
 I have got wet in this city in the middle of no-where , talked to strangers and made them friends , Cycled on the worst possible roads , Ran till my lungs gave up , worked for causes close to my heart , traveled with friends and on my own ,  made few people smile , stayed in silence for few days ( Refer AOL) , Shopped for grocery in Pajamas , Excelled the art of eating Rasam-Rice with my hand without people giving me those weird looks.

Small- small things, aren't they?? But I remember these and not the rating my Boss gave me last year.
Its all not Rosy though, I still miss those people up in North who comfort me with just one hug  and their presence. Sometimes , it still makes me realize I don't belong here , but just sometimes.
Most of the time it embraces me with cool breeze , sumptous idlis and dosas , non interfering people and a hope that Dreams can be for real.

Its a beautiful beautiful city to live in , to cherish your freedom , to be Yourself.
So what are you waiting for?? Pack your bags , Me and my City will welcome you with a warm hug, cool breeze, hot Idlis and lots of HOPE.

On Getting Married

The day I told my parents I got a job, even before getting the location or the offer letter , after the congratulatory ritual the next statement they made was" Now you should get Married" . 2.5 years since that day , it has just got worse!!
This is a common well heard story of any youth in their mid twenties. "When are you Getting married" is the first question everyone asks these days, everyone, And I really mean Everyone here! The married friends even if not happy in their own marriage wont leave a chance to cultivate your mind with the seed of getting married , the Cousins who have lived through the entire phase and no matter how unhappy they are make sure to put a teaspoonfull of ghee in the otherwise sky roaring flame started by the parents , I dont even want to mention the Uncles and Aunties and the neighbors and all the random people we meet , they are beyond their limits!!

The hype has been so strong that few of my friends ( count me in) dont go to home for months to escape this torture , family ,friends just dont seem to understand. I hate that category of friends who just cant undertand the single reason we quote for not getting married, even if our age their shrunken mind cant interepret the arguments we make . What matter for them is to just convince us for the idea of getting married as if we are their kids and if we don't listen the society would murder them. I understand these guys are concerned but friends are meant to stand for what we want and not impose something they deem right, arent they? Something like getting married might be right for them just for simple reason  "they are different" but it is not be for us.

I fail to understand why cant people accept the simple rule of live and let live, When we never guided them as to when to get married , when to have a baby , when to shit , it amazes me why cant they shut their mouth and let us suffer ( for they feel we are lonely). I have always relished all the moments when my cousins/friends got married, it was their day and we were there to share their happiness but hey that doesnt mean that we should get married.

Marriage no matter how beautiful or how ugly is a major decision and every human has different priortes , marriage might not be top on the list . It is as simple as that. The society argues there is a certain age, the right age when you should tie the knot, who made these rules??? who??? And how many such rules we have been following?? On the contrary they say there is never a Right age and never a Right time!!

There are better things for us to do, few want to have a good career, few wants to travel, few are not ready yet , few don't believe in the constitution of Marriage , few are still waiting for the right person, and few just don't care . There is nothign wrong with any of this, nothing. And please dont argue with the statement that you can still do all of this after getting married, because you cant, you just cant, there is a change in the equation once you tie the knot.

It gets darn difficult to live in such a society that imposes such thoughts and listen to our heart , but hardly anyone understands this.So respect the choices  we make rather then making us feel miserable by asking that question hundred times because it wont help the cause, it might just  bring some distance and nothing good.There are so many ways people scare us, you wont get a good bloke, you would miss the right age to have kids, you will be lonely blah blah, . We are way above these factors or at least ignoring them as they don't seem to matter , so people keep all these warnings with yourself and save it for your kids.


For those who share the same thoughts it doesn't matter what society says, Marriage might be a good thing to consider as it gives you a companion to share the life with but its not compulsory , maybe not right now but after few years, when you deem right. We ll never be out of people to share our happiness , maybe the no. would decrease but there will always be enough. What matters is we are content with the decision we are making , we are listening to what our heart says because in the end what will matter is if we listened to our heart or the society.